For many weeks till date, I had restrained from putting these soliloquies down; Nigeria is everybody’s business afterall.

Nope, I was wrong. Nigeria actually belongs some sets of people; at least for some times now.

Yes, for the average citizen whose parents do not know the google map to Aso rock dynamics, this Nigeria is not yours.

Its for the reigning political leaders, their poverty stricken die – hard fans and the well paid cabals. The latter are doing their daily well – paid jobs, the former is hoping to be a super-star someday by swallowing all forms of garbage in the name of political tutelage comparable to vouyerism of a sexual pervert!

When the Nigerian born UK parlimentarian Mrs Kemi Adegoke – Badenoch recently stood to address the UK honourables right before her non- black peers, she shone like countless stars. Referring to her African origin in Nigeria, she recounted how she read as a school pupil with candle – light and fetched water from the boreholes many decades ago before finding a better life in UK; a life she can never trade out for anything now as she gesticulates and gets many nods at the words: I am a CONSERVATIVE!

Gloomingly, 39 years down the line, Nigerians are still grappling with poor electricity, lack of potable water, poverty at its peak and even murderous floodings. In fact, Mrs Badenoch is very lucky in her time because terrorism by the intransigent Boko Haram, the over – pampered Fulani herdsmen wielding AK 47 as self defence against any unyielding locals were not her headaches. Now Nigerians count losses and losses everyday: human lives tortured, tackled and targetted to deaths.

Amidst all these tumults, our counsellors- at – law threw another topic to be chewed by the Nigeria’s populace, as they met recently:

Medical negligences in Nigeria: changing the narratives!

Wonderful topic worthy of even scoring CPD (continuing professional development) points I must say.

Well, medical negligences is any act of omission or commission on the part of the medical personnel that deviates from the acceptable and agreeable standards. Even the kindest doctor on earth can become negligent if he or she works in a facility as medieval as any of the average Nigerian health facilities.

Perhaps in my dream, no legal practitioner has been bold enough sue the Nigerian government for failing to provide basic hospital needs as simple as syringes or even hand gloves, not to talk of something as essential as oxygen source and delivering devices. I am yet to be smitten by such self-less records.

In fact, hundreds of patients buy all these things while queuing all day to see one doctor within many almost collapsibles called buildings and they pass the purview of the sons and daughters of the lady Justitia. The rots that romance the health facilities in many remote places are monstrous but there are no narratives from the learned colleagues yet!

Asides government negligences of her statutory roles in health care delivery which have led to many needless deaths, what about our petrifying and putrefying justice system. How many judges stand trials before the very justice they have perverted? Not a unit figure.

The number of forceful resignations prescribed to handful of erring judges by the Nigerian bar association make you wonder if corruption has not overpowered our democracy. This is distasteful, yet these are good topics to flex muscles on if our lawyers would look closely.

Even Mr. Falana could not match his son – Falz’s voice of ”this is Nigeria” any longer. Falana that likes throwing grammars at us on our screens at the pre – Buhari’s era has gone into solitude. Not even Sowore’s arrest could bring oga SAN from his forced monastical sojourn.

Nigeria is a ”beautiful” playing stage or theatre where talents get buried by the very group trained to nurture such great minds!

The interesting twist for Mr Sowore however is how his campaigns for Mr Buhari in 2015 was unprecedented using his media outfit. Now simple English: ”revolution” has landed Mr Sowore into cans of cankerworms. We pray for your safe return bros…

How one becomes guilty of a vocabulary quagmire in the name of protest is horrendously terrific. Not even Soyinka’s nobel laureate English could stop Buhari’s government from acting like Mr Sanni Abacha. Again, our lord temporals are still meeting.

Is this a case or a piece of cake?
Sorry, I digressed.

But can one be bothered? You should not really because I am not.

The Ex – CJN got thrown under the bus with no protests from the court’s houses across the country. And Mr Shanko’s technicality stories flew before the senates; they lick the stories that got many cerebral Nigerians puking. Again our new senates’ chief danced to the admiration of his ”fathers” in the background. Our rubber stamp senates! No protest from the SANs yet.

And even, the ex – governors – who practically mortgage their former states were found at the ministerial screening….wawu!

Yet, all they did were to take a bow before Mr Lawan, by now you should know your integrity stories are fables. Interestingly, out of his zealousness of ensuring soft landing, another senator was praising Mr.Ogbeni for ”dashing” out the salaries that Ogbeni said he never got for 8 years of being the governor! Ah….oju gba mi tii!

This is how to fight corruption wholistically and tactically.

And we told those naive ones but they were cleaning their ears with pestles like a patient with chronic tinnitus. They were conniving even to steal ballot boxes: it’s time to enjoy your integrity of a calamity now ojee. You can still argue with your keyboard sha.

Just don’t travel late on the highways, you may be walking into your kinsmen who use human blood to nurture their cows…. When the priests of the Church are not spared the horrors of killing and maiming: Fr. Paul Offu paid ransom with his blood. You should reflect deeply.
The government is only on top of the matter to fish out the killers after the deeds have been done. As usual.

To prevent terrorism in Nigeria seems not to be an option, rather, the criminals are smoked out on papers after their idiocies are completed.

But how much does a life cost in Nigeria?

Perhaps, it costs the ten- ten taosan of Osibajo’s trader moni that has gone into extinction since the election was won or the five – five thousand that greased those hands at the pollings? Or the pockets of grains shared at the market places?

The Nigeria’s socio-political negligences laced with the judiciary ineptitudes are enough to dwindle our numbers in thousands if you have forgotten brethren; the medical negligences are products of failing system therefore!

Nonetheless, my dearest dokitas, ye great Hippocratic brethren of heroism, the great cousins of Sir Hutchinson and relatives of Sir Flemming, I would not end without reeling off these satires:

Oga doctor who likes to admit a 26 – weeker of a preemie in your cubicle called neonatal unit without an oxygen ”moderating device” called CPAP (Continous positive airway pressure), no constant electricity to even maintain the thermoneutral environment for the ailing micro-neonate in your ”kanewood” of an incubator. In fact, the oxygen cylinder you are managing can catch fire any time due to leakages and then you are nursing 20 something babies with only 2 nurses. In the name of helping the institution and the patients!
Ah…your summons are already being written by the lawyers and your negligence ”no get part two” sir!

And to my chief of the nephro units who like to admit uraemic patients with kidney failures without dialysis machine in your vicinity. Sir, you like to put the younger colleagues through hell of a call in the name of monitoring such patients for stabilization. You would now send the patient on Oxygen from Abakaliki to Owerri for dialysis that is overdue. You don’t want to explain the meaning of emergencies to the SANs really and you don’t want to give lectures on indications for dialysis to non – medical students under duress? Do you? Stop that thing bros!

Indeed, you just admitted another head – injured patient whose Glasgow coma scale (GCS) was 5/15 and you had no CT or MRI scan at your finger tips. You keep hammering a 50 – 50 chance to the relatives at every counselling; they cannot afford a neuro-imaging looking at them abi? You even told them to pray more. Hahaha….no one practices trying by error medicine again biko.

You are the very reason for those lawyers’ conferences; you cannot save all the patients, refer ”awe” or the relatives sign they have refused to be reffered because they had no money. Stop usurping responsibilities that is not yours sir!

And our dearest house officers, you have been left to sort out the general hospitals where you finally found yourself. You have become the senior medical officers because you have been left unsupervised through no fault of yours. Your state governor has no specialist for your training or those ones available ran for their lives from insecurity and what have you. Let me shock you dearest sib: the Medical and dental council of Nigeria would not licence you to full practice if they get to know you work unsupervised!

In other words, doctors should stop being scape goats for the failed health care system in Nigeria!

Its time to stop manufacturing what you cannot defend in a court of competent jurisdiction brethren.

If a doctor could slump in the gathering of many other doctors and there was no one single defribillator in sight to safe the day, why are you promising other well meaning Nigerians survival in the case of a cardiac rest?

We are becoming the victims of the system we like to augument. I had thought that such a painful loss of a promising General secretary of FMC Abeokuta (RIP great doctor) would have made many doctors demand for functioning defribillators at every secondary to tertiary facilities since that day. We are yet to make any demand till date….Haba!

A hospital is meant to provide care: curative or preventive, to tend the sick and uplift the well ones. If your facility cannot provide any of these, then you should resign honourably before your proper documentation and communication and documentation turns you into a local receptionist joor!

Afterall, the hospital is not supposed to be a Calvary or a Meccah where people expect miraculous saves; hospitals are meant to give assurance and restoration to a better life than the patients were met. It is a serious medical negligence and breach of patient’s trust to give false hope using stone age resources!

Before I wind down, stop giving caricature of a statistics too. What is 50:50 chance in a comatose head – injured trauma case whose brainstem is soaked in apparent blood clots hidden to your naked eyes. No brain scan, no neuro -surgeon!

Are you a miracle worker or a doctor?

You got to be kidding me o ”jeee”: you don’t even have a reliable indemnity too; you will pay for all the systemic failures, the LLBs want to scatter your MB;BS as in Quod Erat Demonstradum (QED)!

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